1. Babies do not poop in one neat spot. The odds are 110003932432 to 1 that you are going to touch baby poo with your bare hands. Just accept it. There is not a 100% foolproof diaper in existence that can contain every single bit of a new babies’ poo.
2. There are reasons that people with young children have a package of wipes in one size or another in every vehicle and bag they own, and probably one in many rooms in their home. (See #1)
3. Whenever you start a sentence with “I’m never going to (insert whatever here)…” or “We’re never going to (insert that same whatever here)…,” fully expect most veteran parents within earshot (or who see it if in writing) will snicker, roll their eyes or laugh at you. It isn’t that they don’t find it cute…it’s just that until you have lived through some of the things you think you will never do…most of us find that a lot of the “nevers” turned into “I/We did that.”
4. Babies are on a mission. Sure, they are cute, they make adorable noises and their heads have the most awesome smell in the world. But under all that adorable cuteness lies a tiny being determined to never let you sleep again. Oh sure, they’ll throw you a bone now and then- maybe its a few hours in a row, or sleeping through the night- but don’t be fooled. They lull you into a false sense of security and then…just when you think “ok! I am sleeping again!” they change all of their sleeping habits. Often, they will celebrate this occasion and their victory by revisiting item #1 on this list.
5. There’s a rumor circulating around that riding in the car can calm or soothe a baby. This may happen on occasion, but…as mentioned in #4, it’s only to lull you into a false sense of security. Most babies, including my own, view the car as a torture device. They may start screaming before get into the carseat.
What else do you think people don’t tell about having a baby?
patricia says
haha I Agree with the car being a torture device. Now I remember being pregnant with my second girl and telling all the nurses and parents with more than one kid that my first girl was very colicky I remember they would tell me not to worry because you only get 1 colicky baby. Yeah right, did NOT happened with me.
Karen Glatt says
My sister is having a baby next month, and I know that she will be having to deal with these things! This happens all mothers and a mother does not know what is going to happen to her when she has her baby and goes through this!
Marcie W. says
I agree with each and every tip above, however, I wanted to add that you WILL sleep again. The golden rules are “This too shall pass” and “Savor every moment!”
queenb says
I haven’t slept much yet- my oldest is turning 7 *tears* Maybe when they are 3, 5 and 7 I will sleep again. Maybe. LOL
Bekah Kuczenski says
I like #3, so true all those things I said Id never do I’m starting to do. And all those ideas I WAS definitely going to do I quickly found out those things don’t work lol
queenb says
Yes, Pretty much. I was never going to cloth diaper- “they make disposables for a reason” I said. I swore I’d never co-sleep, or feed the kids peanut butter before they were 3. Of course, that peanut butter thing worked for the first 2 but the little one, she grabbed part of her brothers sandwich at 18 months…so technically I NEVER did…haha.
JulieK says
That babies ARE the proof of Murphy’s Law. Over and over and over! 🙂
queenb says
Yes!! and over again…and again…