I’ll be honest… when I had my first child I had absolutely NO idea what I was doing. I think most new parents feel this way. My anxiety was increased by the fact that everyone…EVERYONE felt the need to give me their unsolicited advice about what I should or shouldn’t be doing. I quickly learned to just ignore the advice I didn’t find pertinent, and found no shame in harassing reaching out to, those whose advice I wanted.
My best friend fell into that category.
Since she had her first child before I did, I highly valued her opinion and tips and tricks of the trade that she’d picked up along the way. That didn’t stop with the baby phase. Since her first child is older than mine, she reached many new milestones and experiences before I did, and I love hearing her insight on things. In all of these years, she’s always had my back. I can’t stress how special I feel to have someone that I can count on for advice. Now that we’re further along into adulthood, I still turn to her for advice and insight.
So, when I called her in hysterics because #1 the baby’s umbilical stump was gushing blood had a speck of red blood, and when I turned around to grab a wipe she rolled herself (which probably means her heavy for her body head turned and she was so tiny, her body turned too) off of the couch and plummeted to the floor managed to land on the rug beneath the couch which was low to the ground anyway, she didn’t laugh. At least, I didn’t hear her. She was gentle. She was kind. She was firm. She gave it to me straight. And I believe straight went something like:
Brett MARTHA! You are the mom, and you cannot go into hysterics at every single speck of blood. She’s going to fall down. She’s GOING to get hurt. I promise you that. But she’s going to sense you are upset and you will make it worse. Take some deep breaths and get hold of yourself.”
And you know? It worked. I’ve never ever been hysterical again, not once. I mean, except for a few major times, but those don’t count. They were exceptions and not the norm. But her unfailing love for me was enough for her to not coddle me and give me a kick in the pants. Yes, sometimes the umbilical stumps do bleed. No, most of the time, it is not anything serious. Yes, babies have rolled off of a couch onto the carpet before and been fine. (Mind you, the baby never cried. Not once. It was all me). She may not be giving me advice about newborns or first time parenting, but she sure does kick me in the seat of the pants when I need it. Which is probably reason 3424326 that I love her so much.
That advice has stayed with me for 9+ years. I’ve passed it along to others. It’s important to remember, in those moments when the unknown happens, especially as a parent. It’s not our turn to freak out. We had our time.
State Farm is another resource I can always count on. I’m sure you’re thinking “what in the world could insurance possibly have to do with your best friend?” The answer…. Lots. Becoming a parent has also left me a much better planner than I was before. Not to mention a worrier. I often worry about the “what-ifs”, and what will happen in the event that the unexpected becomes reality.
With State Farm, I have confidence. Confidence that I’m covered in the case of an unexpected event. Confidence that I will be respected and treated well if I have a question or concern. And most importantly, confidence that my insurance company places as heavy of an emphasis on my families well being as I do.
Throughout this journey of life, I’ve added a few more people to my team of trusted resources. I’m sure I’ll add a few more over the years as well. My team is made up of a doctors, teachers, mentors, friends, and of course… my husband. They say it takes a village… I think it takes a team!
Like a good neighbor State Farm is there.
Who’s on your team?
Disclosure: Compensation was provided by State Farm via Mode Media. The opinions expressed herein are those of the author and are not indicative of the opinions or positions of State Farm.
Disclosure: Compensation was provided by State Farm via Mode Media. The opinions expressed herein are those of the author and are not indicative of the opinions or positions of State Farm.
Amie H says
Coverage removes stress and one less thing to worry about
Debi @ The Spring Mount 6 Pack says
When I had my first baby, I was a basket case. By baby number four, I realized that things happen. Kids can’t live in a bubble.
Dee Mauser says
Aww, being a first time mom is full of ups and downs, love, coos, giggles, and tears. Of course you are scared with your first child because you have no idea what to expect and at times don’t really know how to react in certain situations. It’s always great to have someone you can go to when you need advice.
Kelly Stilwell says
Excellent post! First time motherhood is nerve wracking. You worry about everything to the point of insanity.
Tosh says
Yes it Definitely takes a village, a big challenge but yet so rewarding:)
Jennifer says
When my sister had her first baby, she worried a lot. Thank goodness she had a lot of people around her who’d had babies already.
Liz Mays says
Yes, I’ve definitely had to rein in my true feelings to make sure the kids didn’t pick up on my nerves. She gave you great advice.
Jen Temcio @ Dapperhouse says
Being a first time mom is a really scary thing. Everything’s new. Everything’s a possible hazard in your new mom eyes. By the second one, you pretty much know that if you don’t drop them on their heads, you’re doing great.
Amber Edwards says
Being a mom is quite scary. So glad you had a great support resource to help you through the scary times. I had my sisters and Mom for the first bit, and now close friends to turn to.
Kristin says
I agree being a mom is a scary thing. Having that what if coverage sure does make those moments a lot less stressful.